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One of the few things that keep my mood up at the moment is clips of me riding. Imagining the feeling on my horse. I am going to be honest. Me not being able to ride SUCKS! When the doctor said I was going to have to wait three months I thought I was going to die, not literally but you know what I mean. At the same time I now understand why. My hip has to heal and the prosthetic has to settle in, and I am still in a lot of pain from time to time. It has also put a lot of strain on the rest of my body and other pain. In the equestrian world it sometimes feel like a competition, how fast can you get up on the horse after your accident? I don't like it and I have had a lot of anxiety because I feel bad that I probably won't be able to ride sooner. But bad for what exactly? That I am putting myself in a situationen where the risk for another injury becomes a lot bigger? Because other people tell me that I should probably be fine to ride in a couple of weeks, even though they have no idea? No. I rather heal properly and make sure that I can have a long riding career and a happy life, than entering a competition that is far beyond stupid. Being smart is cool, being dumb is not. Even though it sucks for now.